Ditching the lbs No 1

human BarbieThe more astute of my followers have noticed that, almost 2 weeks into the year, I have been strangely silent on the 3rd part of my challenge. Reading books and watching movies is entertaining. Losing weight is not and, for me, it’s going to be the hardest part of the year.

Lets just get one thing straight. Unlike the oddly fascinating ValeriaLukyanova, I do not aspire to be a human Barbie doll!Β I have struggled with weight loss and dieting for 35 years. This strikes me as an inordinate waste of emotion and energy, but (despite my rational self) where my fat is concerned, my dress size is directly proportionate to the level of my self-worth. I believe this is a psychological characteristic I share with many women – the size of my arse is my personal Richter Scale of self-esteem. It’s really very simple – the higher I go on the Dress Denominator, the lower I go on the Importance Indicator. At Size 20 I am completely worthless, at 14 I am competent but unremarkable, at 10 I would set the world on fire with my brilliance!

terrysI have long given up any notions of ever being a size 10, but I aspire to be normal. Size 14 or so. Losing 10lbs would put me squarely in that bracket.

My diet of choice is the widely publicised The Fast Diet. 2 days a week of 500 calories, 5 days a week of eating ‘normally’. So, yesterday was a Fasting Day: I ate a small bowl of porridge, an orange, 2 eggs and some smoked salmon. Today is a ‘normal’ day – I’ve eaten a bowl of cereal and half a Terry’s Chocolate Orange. Well, that is normal for me! Doesn’t seem like a recipe for weight loss success to me, but I’ll keep you posted!


3 thoughts on “Ditching the lbs No 1

  1. Olivia Feb 2, 2014 / 9:53 am

    How is the weight loss going?

    I thought a bit about the weight and self-esteem connection which you mention, because I experience that too, and so, it seems, do a lot of people, ( not just women either ), and I don’t think that it is only because Western society seems to be in thrall to/worship images of thin/slim women, or because of the widespread belief that being overweight is a symptom of a “shameful”/damning lack of self-control etc, or the fact that sugar and gluten are not only addictive substances for many/most people but can/do very often also have a profoundly negative effects on mood, ( anxiety, depression, etc ) but also perhaps because self-esteem tends to be linked to what one is doing generally in life, whether one is in love with what one is doing, feels useful or creative etc, and how often/much one eats for comfort, and out of boredom, to fill a void, etc … I eat less when I am in love or happily absorbed in something, eg. creative or investigative. … Do you think that may be a factor in your weight gain and lower self-esteem? Boredom/disappointment/frustration?

    I hope things are going well. Good luck and best wishes again with it all. πŸ˜€

    Olivia x

    PS. Feel free to delete my message on your “Heist” blog post if you want; I was feeling rather glum myself that day, and disappointed that yet again your film choice had been so underwhelming for you ( and me :lol ). I’m a bit of a nut about films. πŸ™‚

  2. Olivia Jan 12, 2014 / 12:14 pm

    :lol Great post. πŸ™‚ Totally sympathise with the chocolate orange! I sometimes manage to deal with my own tendency to this sort of eating by not having anything like that in the house, so that when “the hunger”/cravings/nibbling need strikes I have to fall back on chopped apple and yoghurt, or cook something. But it’s not failsafe. Yesterday I ate half of a large packet of peanut-butter corn-puffs ( for first time ever, bought in fit of out-of-order-pc-frustration while doing weekly-big-shop ) … I’m feeling the absence of my pc ( crashed by wrecked RAM ) and the webcam … and rereading the Mapp and Lucia books and watching favourite TV series and eating stuff at same time to “make it/the “comfort” go further” somehow. Mashed banana on rice cakes is pretty good for that too, as is mashed mixed veg ( as in Belgium; steamed potatoes, carrots, celery, fennel, and garlic mushed up with herb salt and accompanied by a little yoghurt/cream cheese with chopped chives plus pumpkin seeds ).

    My main problem is lack of exercise. 😦 And the traditional pear-shape thing where everything collects around the hips and belly.

    The “Fast Diet” sounds good. I have tried that sort of approach from time to time, and I think it may help/may have made a difference … except when I “reacted” to each two day “fast” by a total blow-out the first “normal” day after it that is … . :lol 😦 πŸ˜• I’m finding, just recently, that the most important thing ( even more than cutting out gluten, not mixing concentrated carbohydrates with concentrated proteins at the same meal, reducing starchy carbs, almost completely cutting out sugar, going to bed early/at a reasonable and regular time every day, “keeping busy”, falling in love, etc etc etc ) … is, ( sadly and “tediously” :lol ) … just eating remarkably little compared to the pervasive highly visible images of “normal eating” promulgated in media, ads, etc. 😦 I think that there’s simply way way too much ( often highly addictive, like sugar ) food available ( for me )! πŸ™‚ 😦 … Many of us, brought up on substantial but spaced-out feeds in infancy, which stretched our tiny baby stomachs, rather than on many/10-15 little feeds per day, have been neurologically programmed to lay down stocks whenever get access to food.

    Anyway, hope you don’t mind my massively long comment. :oops! Feel free to edit/cut it down! πŸ˜€ Best of luck and good wishes for this. πŸ™‚

    • inthenickioftime Jan 12, 2014 / 3:45 pm

      Thanks for taking the time to comment, Olivia – I like some of your tips for not-so-bad food ideas, particularly the Belgian mixed veg. I lived in Brussels for a while and the family I lived with used to cook it, sometimes with lardons (and a Belgian beer!). I hope you managed to get your computer fixed soon, its like having an arm cut off, isn’t it?

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